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USA January 2, 1999 VNN2776 See Related VNN Stories Reinitiation Is Forbidden BY KRSNA PREMA DEVI DASI USA, Jan 2 (VNN) — Dear Bhakti dasi Prabhu, All glories to Srila Prabhupada our ever well wisher. Please accept my humble obeisances. As I wrote to you previously I do not work closely with Kapindra Maharaja anymore so I did not know your situation. I called him after my first letter to you and after I found out your letter was published on VNN. He said to me that it was not that he refused you, he told you that one can not become uninitiated. I explained exactly this to you as I also explained that in Caitanya Caritamrta it is stated that reinitiation is forbidden. I remember the bliss we shared that Gaura Purnima when we were initiated together as Srila Prabhupada's daughters. Certainly Sri Sri Nitai Gauranga never looked more radiant, bedecked with peacock crowns, garlanded with fragrant roses and wearing Their new golden outfits from Vrndavana. Our godsisters and godbrothers couldn't have been kinder to have prepared such a beautiful celebration. Mothers Draupadi and Vani dasi, Jagat Guru das, Saksi Gopal das, Bala das, Kapindra Maharaja and so many others made it sublime. Srila Prabhupada was there in his murti form, in his books and in the hearts of his disciples as they carried out his instructions. Together, I sat beside you, as we threw our grains into the sacrificial fire and as those grains crackled in the ghee, Srila Prabhupada accepted us. It is a moment so unforgettable, so transcendental and merciful, far beyond my ability to express in words. In those few seemingly timeless moments I felt Srila Prabhupada enter into my heart and I into his. My physical heart almost felt like it stopped as a tiny notion of how great Srila Prabhupada's love is illuminated my mind. The room appeared golden. With that hot fire warming our faces, I felt a burden lift out of me. I felt lighter. That profound moment is etched forever in my spiritual history as it is also etched in to yours though your realization of it might not have surfaced yet. Their Lordships Nitai Gauranga looked down upon us with Their lotus eyes as we surrendered our lives to Srila Prabhupada. We made a vow before Them, Srila Prabhupada, the assembled devotees and before the altar of fire. It is an eternal connection that can not be broken simply because one choses to reject it. This action would only increase one's suffering and moreover displease our Spiritual master Srila Prabhupada. I beg you as your godsister not to speak against your vow to Srila Prabhupada or his acceptance of you. Please give up this idea of self annulment. There is no precedent for it in sastra. We all make mistakes so the devotees will understand. Srila Prabhupada is tolerant as a tree. Please meditate on the memory of that Gaura Purnima and how we are connected to Srila Prabhupada and to each other. As I wrote to you in my previous letter, you are certainly linked to Srila Prabhupada. This is cause for great joy. Kapindra Maharaja did not mislead you in fact he led you away from the Mayavadi philosophy you were deeply mired in. Maybe this is his fault but I do not consider it as such. At a time when I needed guidance Kapindra Maharaja was on the scene and he was there for you too. In fact he brought you to Srila Prabhupada's Krsna consciousness movement. For this alone you should give him all respects. I pay my obeisances to Kapindra Maharaja for moving me off the mental platform concerning the rtvik issue. It is not only a knowing with the intelligence that it is the correct instruction but it is also a knowing with the heart through service. It is not that we shouldn't know the philosophy because that would make us sentimentalists but also we should engage in service to feel the reciprocation with Srila Prabhupada. Unfortunately immediately after your initiation you left before you could taste the nectar of service. I think this is one reason you are failing to understand your situation or Srila Prabhupada's instruction. I also feel parties with certain agendas might be willing to exploit your situation so you should be careful. After all it is your very own spiritual life that is at stake. It is true Kapindra Swami does not have official authorization from the GBC to perform rtvik initiation but then neither does the GBC have authorization to appoint gurus. I believe Kapindra Maharaja is qualified because he is strictly following and is performing regular harinama, prasadam and book distribution and is attempting to engage others directly in to Srila Prabhupada's service. He has stuck his neck out for us. It deeply concerns me that your present association has brought you to the point of committing offenses to your spiritual master Srila Prabhupada and also to your godbrother Kapindra Maharaja. Instead of paying respects you have brought your lawyer to visit Kapindra Swami at the Prabhupada center in NYC and before the Deities that you took a vow, you told him you were going to renounce your vows. It is makes me very sad that you do not understand the situation. I do understand if you have had differences of opinion with Kapindra Swami's style of working. I've had them too. That is natural in this material world when we are so young in our Sadhana. Please look inside your heart and ask what has been the motivation for declaring that you want to undo your vows. Don't let it be these differences. Again whatever the future brings I will always consider you my godsister Bhakti dasi because I know the reality of what happened that glorious Gaura Purnima. I want to encourage you to have all success in Krsna consciousness. Please forgive me if this letter offends you. It is not intended to. This is the most serious situation and I want to speak frankly with you. I await your reply. With all my best, your godsister, Krsna Prema devi dasi See Related VNN Stories | Comment on this Story This story URL: http://vaishnava-news-network.org/usa/US9901/US02-2776.html
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