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EDITORIAL December 26, 1999 VNN5152 Comment on this story The Truth Often Hurts BY MAHAVEGAVATI DASI EDITORIAL, Dec 26 (VNN) — Reply to Dhanajaya Pandit & Sridhari devi dasi prabhus Dear Dhanajaya Pandit & Sridhari devi dasi prabhus, Hare Krsna. All glories to Srila Prabhupada, to our Guru Varga, and the assembled Vaisnavas. I saw your letter on VNN and would like to make a reply, especially since you asked "If someone of you all can give us some support or feedback we will sincerously apreciate it." (Of course there is so much that can be said, but I will try to make it brief.) The truth often hurts, and it can hurt very deeply, especially when we come to a movement which is meant to deliver the Absolute Truth - and that includes the relative truth - and yet we find that many of the leaders are guilty of being liars, cheaters, deviates even from the nondevotee norms, etc. It is MOST painful to understand that this is so. Like you, I was also very innocent in so many ways when I joined the movement. I gave up literally everything, (family, fiance, education, money, etc.) to move into the temple and serve because I saw that ISKCON, (or at least the philosophy that ISKCON was supposed to be following), was THE highest spirituality. Thus, I had no second thought to leave everything behind to go and serve Srila Prabhupada through the ISKCON that he had set up. Due to my full surrender, I was left crippled due to following some very downright BAD, EXPLOITIVE, and ultimately, very ABUSIVE instructions from some of my ISKCON authorities. Even I could have lived fairly peacefully with those results IF present day ISKCON had remained better on track. You wrote in your letter, "I am denouncing being CHEATED by my local GBC. He lied. And he is cheating his well-wishers to believe in his words that are now stronger than ours." Well prabhu, welcome to the "real" world of present day ISKCON, (or as I sometimes call it - with reference to deviations from the ISKCON that Srila Prabhupada wanted - ITSGON or ITS A CON). Sadly, this lying on the part of ISKCON leaders and character assassination of honest devotees is coming to be part of the "norm," so to speak. There seem to be so many stories of it. "But I wonder if he would swear all that as true in front of the Lord? "WE CAN SWEAR THE TRUTH BEFORE THE LORD and we have witnesses and evidence if it is needed. "I am writing this letter with my heart broken and my eyes full of falling tears. I still love ISKCON; I deeply love my Guru Maharaja and Srila Prabhupada. And we love many nice devotees with whom we reciprocate in a brotherly relationship. But this ISKCON of nowadays is too much oppposite from what I joined so long ago." I would have to agree with so many of the words you expressed. As far as your GBC being willing to "swear all that as true in front of the Lord," sadly, if he is dishonest, he might not go before the Deities, or he might go and simply lie, RIGHT IN THE PRESENCE OF THE DEITY. I personally had that experience of Bhaktitirtha Swami lying in the presence of EIGHTEEN Silas. He REFUSED to speak the truth, EVEN IN THE PRESENCE OF EIGHTEEN SILAS, about certain things which he had done in the past. I was completely amazed to see him lie in the presence of the Deities. I even purposely did NOT bring up certain things which I thought would be too embarrassing for him to have to address, because I did not want to put him into a position of feeling unable to speak truthfully, and having to lie in front of the Deities, thus committing that offense, yet even the simple things which I TRIED to address, Bhaktitirtha Swami LIED about, DESPITE THE PRESENCE OF THESE EIGHTEEN SILAS. Originally it was decided that we would go before the Deity of Lord Nrsimhadev in New Vrindavan. (This was Bhaktitirtha Maharaja's choice of Deity that he wanted to speak in front of.) Decided at the Mayapur festival of 1997 that the meeting would take place in July, on July 10th, 1997, at the VERY LAST MINUTE, I was told that the meeting would NOT take place in the temple room before the Deity as planned, but rather in Bhaktitirtha Swami's cabin in New Vrndavan where no Deities were present. Since the meeting did NOT take place on time - I went there at the scheduled time and they were not ready - I went back to where I was staying and brought up the 18 Silas to his cabin. To my amazement, ANY ISSUE that I tried to address, Bhaktitirtha Maharaj simply LIED about, RIGHT WITH THE SILAS PRESENT BEFORE HIM. When I saw that he would not be honest, I would not address any more issues as I did not want to put him into the position of making any more offenses by his lying any further. False ego is a very heavy thing, and most difficult to conquer over, even for a so-called "guru." Real guru will NEVER do these kind of things as a real guru ONLY wants to link the living entity to Krsna. Real guru's ego is that he is the servant of Krsna and the servant of Krsna's servants. There is no false ego is the real guru. It is as simple as that. It seems that because you are sincere, (from the words you expressed in your letter to VNN in your article, "Broken Heart"), that Krsna has put you into a situation where your honesty has caused you some difficulty and thus, is forcing you to see things as they REALLY are. Sadly, there is A LOT of corruption in the ITSGON of today. sach bale tomare luta juta jagat mohaye Srila Prabhupada said this: "When one tells lies, everyone is enchanted, but when one tells the truth, he is beaten with sticks." So you are experiencing the result of speaking truthfully within the ranks of ITSGON. "The most "beautiful" word that he actually used to describe us is "DEMONS." Well, let us just hope that he doesn't go further than that. (Some of the ISKCON leaders have killed devotees for their honest words.) "Since then, we are being blamed by ALL his disciples and the GBC himself, always behind our back." This is pretty typical: As the SB (7th canto ch 5) says, "The blind lead the blind and they all fall into the ditch." (The verse also refers to materially attached "gurus.") "Even after we waited for a meeting to clarify the situation, this GBC-guru never called us, but he met with the members of our zone--most of them bhaktas that don't even follow the regulative principles--and blamed us openly. Sadly, it is not the first time that this GBC-guru has made this kind of politics against devotees. Well, you said it yourselves, "This is not the first time..." Just shows you the character of this particular GBC-(so called) "guru." Sadly, he is NOT alone. There are other GBCs, "gurus" and GBC-"gurus" like him who do the EXACT SAME thing. "All we did was denounce an irregularity." Well, for some of our GBCs, "gurus", GBC-"gurus", doing just that, is BAD, enough to get a devotee, (a real devotee), hanged. (No puns intended.) "If we were wrong, why not bring it to our attention, instruct us properly, and solve the problem?" Because THAT is the Vaisnava way of doing things, and sadly, some of these men are NOT Vaisnavas. (See Srila Prabhupada's purports in CC Madhya 1.218, 220). "If we were right, then great for ISKCON. But what need is there to blame and ban us? To try to destroy us?" Because my dear prabhus, you hurt their false egos, and a man may even kill someone for doing that. (I myself was threatened with death for the EXACT SAME reason; false ego.) "We feel abused and we feel cheated because a guru & GBC is supposed to be a well-wisher." Well, one must ask the question: "Is this GBC really your well-wisher and well-wisher of the other devotees, or is he his OWN well-wisher? "But throughout all my years in Argentina, even before our having problems with this GBC-guru, we heard devotees complaining about his rude behaviour against some devotees who also have done nice service for Srila Prabhupada for so long. How can a guru feel good by spiritually killing devotees? Why does he NEVER try to develop a health comunication with the devotees?" False ego and the desire to control. (Material consciousness: We WANT to be Krsna. We do NOT want to be servant. Dasa anudasa das....) "Seriously speaking, for us to be Hare Krsnas in this zone is embarassing." Yes, even though I am a disciple of Srila Prabhupada, (and I am PROUD to be able to say that Srila Prabhupada is my father), I am MOST embarrassed to identify myself as an ISKCON devotee, because of ISKCON's current record. (I STILL DO ALWAYS wear my devotee clothing no matter where I am, unless it is during one of the Buffalo blizzards, but I hem and haw when people ask me if I am from ISKCON.) "Some initiated devotees of our small congregation are openly taking different kinds of drugs; they fight during namahatta programs in front of guests... or even in the streets with devotional clothes. No authority wants to be in charge of this congregation because the devotees here prefer to make their own decisions. Any time a devotee has ever come with the idea to re-open the closed temple, he has been fired by the majority of the members including the GBC." Pretty amazing isn't it. One would think that the GBC would want things cleaned up. But don't be surprised; sadly these things are going one elsewhere as well, in some way, shape or form. "But the worst of it all is how we are told that we can't say anything about the leaders even if they are misguiding or neglecting their service JUST because they are senior." Typical control tactic. Yes, I also was taught that for years. I got one reaction directly from the Deities in Buffalo when I would NOT speak up about a deviation that I was aware of. (The TP was having sex every day RIGHT BEHIND THE ALTAR, but I wouldn't say anything even though I was in such anxiety about it. I just figured that no one would believe me.) Finally there was a Deity fire exactly ONE MINUTE BEFORE the curtains were to open for Mongul Arotike. Seeing the fire, I ran up to take Lord Caitanya off the altar, and He burned my hands very badly. I took it as my reaction for my not speaking up with what I knew. IMMEDIATELY after that, later on in the day, I went to the TP's wife, showed her the burns on my hands, told her my suspicions, and she confirmed them, telling me that she was in such anxiety that her husband was forcing her to break the principles, and right in the back of the altar. She said that she felt so much relieved that I had said something to her. After she confirmed what I knew, I went to the VTP and told him. "I am having a sad vision. ISKCON is very ill--nobody can deny it. More and more devotees are fighting; more and more gurus are having problems. "WE ARE TOO MUCH LACKING IN SINCERE COMUNICATIONS! WE ARE TOO MUCH LACKING IN SINCERITY! WE ARE TOO MUCH LACKING IN TRUTHFULLNESS! WE ARE TOO MUCH LACKING IN THE MOOD OF "DASA DASA ANUDASA!" Who but a FOOL could NOT agree with you? "I am writing this letter with my heart broken and my eyes full of falling tears. I still love ISKCON; I deeply love my Guru Maharaja and Srila Prabhupada. And we love many nice devotees with whom we reciprocate in a brotherly relationship. But this ISKCON of nowadays is too much oppposite from what I joined so long ago." Prabhu, I think SO MANY of us have these VERY SAME sentiments. Do NOT think that you are alone. There are so many of us crying and crying. Even the Pandavas had to cry and feel lamentation when the demonic Duryodhan appeared to have the upper hand. Even if a devotee is put into such a condition, if s/he is a devotee, s/he will use the situation as an opportunity to CRY to Krsna. (That includes crying to bonafide Guru as well.) So if we cry, and that crying is for Guru, Krsna, and our desire to serve Them, then that crying is for good reason, and will only serve to bring us in closer, closer to Their lotus feet. "I will never stop chanting my rounds; I will always go on with my insignificant devotional service; I will always keep caring for all my beautiful Tulasi devi if the Lord kindly gives that mercy; and I will always keep trying to be a servant." Yes, and this is a real devotee: Irregardless of what s/he is put through, despite the seemingly harsh and sometimes - what seems to be - "impossible" tests, a devotee will always remain faithful to Guru and Krsna, and THAT is his/her TRUE wealth. yasya deve para bhaktir yatha deve tatha guru tasyaite katitahyartha prakasante mahat manah With all sincerity I remain your servant, Mahavegavati Dasi Hare Krsna About the Author  Other Stories by this AuthorComment on this story Contact VNN about this storySend this story to a friend
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