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EDITORIAL  First Female Diksha Guru BY PRATYATOSA DASA EDITORIAL, Sep 20 (VNN) — Dear Maharajas and Prabhus: Concerning "ISKCON Nominates First Female Diksha Guru" and "Vanaprastha Or Divorce" First of all, I am just a spaced-out klutz. My only qualification is that I have some small desire to serve Shrila Prabhupada and to try to follow his instructions. The fact that my children turned out as well as they did, despite my own insanity and despite the sometimes crazy, egotistical, materialistic, self-motivated, and even criminal ISKCON leadership, is due to my good wife's (Urmila Devi Dasi's) expert, loving, devoted mothering, and due to the causeless mercy of His Divine Grace Shrila Prabhupada and the causeless mercy of the Supreme Lord Shri Krishna. Please be kind to my wife and kids and give them your blessings. Without the blessings of the Vaisnavas we are all doomed! My wife did not stand up and say "I want to be a guru". The main reason that she was nominated, as far as I know, is because someone is very serious about wanting to be her disciple. Also, just to set the record straight, my wife did not "kick me out of the house", as some are saying. I had been wanting to take vanaprastha for many years before I left home. One reason for wanting to leave home was to give up family attachment after age 50, like Shrila Prabhupada has requested of all of his male grhastha disciples, and I didn'tthink that I would be able to do this while living with or traveling with my wife. Another reason was that I figured that my sons were more likely to stay near her and not move away and fall into maya if I was not there anymore. It was a strategy that worked! It is a fact that I left on her terms rather than my own, but I can see now that it was Krishna acting through her, forcing me to become detached more quickly, and forcing me to not be able to change my mind as I am very prone to do. My wife didn't want me to follow Mahatma Gandhi's bad example. Gandhi kept returning to family life for some time evenafter wanting to give it up, and finally had to take a firm vow of vanaprastha. My wife's lawyer drew up the separation agreement, and changing it would have meant more legal expense. Even though neither of us liked some of the wording, I ordered her not to change it because I thought that it was more important to save Krishna's Laksmi Devi (money). At least I didn't have to pay any alimony, and I didn't have to pay any child support if I couldn't afford it. As it turned out, Harikesa Swami paid me very well in Denmark, so I paid child support not only for my youngest son, but also for my daughter, even though the agreement said that I didn't have to pay anything for her. I also sent money to help pay for my daughter's possible future marriage. Concerning the point about the wife staying with the husband during vanaprastha, this is not the only option: "The Supreme Personality of Godhead said: One who desires to adopt the third order of life, vanaprastha, should enter the forest with a peaceful mind, leaving his wife with his mature sons, or else taking her along with him." (SB 11.18.1) When I asked my wife the following question: "Didn't Srila Prabhupada leave home a long time before he took sannyasa?" ...she answered as follows: "Yes, he did, and left his wife under the care of his sons. His youngest daughter was not yet married, and in fact though he had suggested a suitable young man, she never married. Also, it's a GBC resolution that a man who is considering sannyasa must have a legal separation agreement from his wife, basically so she can't sue him later, etc. That agreement gives *both* of us some understanding and protection. Otherwise, I could sue you for support for me and for the kids (until they were eighteen) since you left. Such a scenario actually happened to ******. He had a verbal agreement with his ex-wife, who had been having a string of affairs, but without a written agreement she sued him for many tens of thousands of dollars, and *won*." While it's true that my wife no longer follows my direct instructions, why should she? I no longer protect her or support her financially. I'm not there to even fully understand her situation. Her grown up sons, on the other hand, have, with the help of my good wife, and with the help of Lord Shri Krishna and Shrila Prabhupada, been trained by me and have been deputed by me to act as my representative. They, together with my son-in-law, are much more intelligent than I am, and they have never eaten meat or taken intoxication in their entire lives! They are living near her, so they can understand her situation, and are therefore in a much better position to protect her and to instruct her than I am. I have complete faith in their ability to protect and to instruct my wife. If my sons and son-in-law approve of what she's doing, then I automatically approve. I am always available by email, so it's very easy for my sons and son-in-law to ask my advice, if they feel that they need it. If you have any further questions, please feel free to contact them directly. I am very happy and satisfied with the present situation, and I am very grateful to Lord Shri Krishna for having made such a nice arrangement for our family. I think many devotees already know my position on gurus within ISKCON: "The original 11 "gurus" took control of ISKCON illegally in 1978 through the agency of lies, the hiding and destroying of documents, the hiding and destroying of audio recordings, banning, beating, and even murdering godbrothers, etc. This can be proven in a court of law. Therefore, they are offenders and anyone who joins up with them are equally offenders. If they aren't punished in this lifetime, then they will have to suffer even more in the future. They are all extreme offenders of Shrila Prabhupada." At the same time, I believe that my wife, is more qualified to be an ISKCON "guru" than 50%, or maybe even 90%, of the present ISKCON "gurus" whom I've come into contact with. Also, Shrila Prabhupada has said that women are innocent: "Children, brahmana, and here it is said stri, woman. According to Vedic politics, the children and brahmana, old men and woman, they have no fault. They are out of all laws of the state. Their fault will never be taken as seriously. They are innocent. They require protection. Now the agitation is that woman should have equal rights with man. So that is not Vedic idea. Vedic idea is that woman should be always protected. She is not independent. Just like child." (730513SB.LA) "Child, brahmana, cow, and woman, they are to be given protection by the laws of Vedic instruction. They have to be protected. So this should be very carefully done. Stri-sudra-dvija-bandhunam. Stri, they are considered either as innocent as the child or as innocent as the animal. So they should be given always protection." (750615SB.HON) ...If women are misguided, then 100% of the bad karma is upon the heads of the men who have misguided them. Therefore could it be that she, if the GBC decides to accept her nomination, will be ISKCON's first non-criminal "living guru" since 1978? Right after my future wife (Bhaktin Edey) turned 18, she moved into the Chicago temple (1973). For me it was "love at first sight". If only my desire to serve Shrila Prabhupada was half as strong as it was to marry that intelligent, beautiful, energetic bhaktin! The quality which I found to be the most attractive about her was her incredible enthusiasm for chanting, dancing, and for performing devotional service. It was truly amazing and inspiring to behold. We became legally married 4 months later, and 4 months after that she was pregnant with our first son. When I first married her, she didn't even know who Shrila Prabhupada was, so it's obvious that I had something to do with her training in Krishna consciousness, and I am very proud of her and her many achievements. If you do a search of the "Vedabase" (http://www.vedabase.com/) for "good father good daughter" (including the quotes), you'll find that Shrila Prabhupada only said this once (750713r3.phi), and he was referring to my father-in-law, and my wife. The occasion was Shrila Prabhupada's giving Gayatri mantra to my wife in person, just as he had done for me 3 years earlier. We had a wonderful marriage, and our home was, for the most part, full of Krishna consciousness, peace, harmony, and love, especially love for Shrila Prabhupada. Together, we raised three wonderful children (natural delivery at home, just like Shrila Prabhupada's children), whom I'm also very proud of. Our family stayed together when the leaders were pushing artificial "renunciation" and irresponsibility (NY, 1975-76). I had a high paying karmi job when everyone was supposed to live in the temple (NY, 1975-79). Ours was the first family in ISKCON to own a personal computer (NY, 1977), the first one to donate a computer to ISKCON (NY, 1977), and the first one in ISKCON to start a Krishna conscious day school (Detroit, 1982). My wife was one of the first women in ISKCON to start giving classes in the temple room after Shrila Prabhupada's disappearance (Detroit, 1982). My wife is a very highly qualified disciple of Shrila Prabhupada, and I wish her well in all of her endeavors. Your servant, Pratyatosa Dasa (pratyatosa@hotmail.com - http://pratyatosa.com/) Contact VNN about this story  Send this story to a friend
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